Nadine in India in 1998

During the last few days we spent a lot of time opening old, long stored boxes; a wonderful journey on Memory Lane.

In an old travel diary, I found a poem that I had written in India back in 1998 and that I’d love to share with you.

Restless

I’m travelling around the world to find peace
I’m looking everywhere, but still don’t feel at ease.

I know I can only find it deep inside
during times of rest
but whatever I do it’s not to my best.

When I’m busy I wish I had time to relax and stop
but whatever I do, I don’t feel on top.

When I have time to myself
I don’t know how to use it
and try to find things to do instead of sit.

I want to find the entrance to my inner world
I’m trying hard, but all the ways seem curled.

I want to find it, but I’m filled with fear
standing in front of a closed door fills my eyes with a tear.

I don’t know anymore what I’m looking for
and if my past believings are true,
but whatever happens I’ll have to get through.

I’m insecure as things have changed a lot
I’ve got the lid, but not the pot.

I’ve been at this point before, away from my track
doubts, no sense, but whatever happens I’ll find back.